I, the divorced cable gown

D|o|G, 2018 | Den middelalderlige dommedagshymne Dies iræ (Vredens dag) blev formentlig skrevet engang i 1200-tallet af den italienske franciskanermunk Thomas af Celano. I hymnen beskrives verdens undergang – hvordan alskabningen skal stilles for den himmelske domstol og svare for sig selv, men ikke vil have meget at sige til sit forsvar. Derfor anråbes der om Guds nåde. Nu slår D|o|G – Diaper of Glory – til med et digt af samme strenghed og samme apokalyptiske dimensioner. Spørgsmålet er blot, hvem der nu vil møde til forsvar for den samtid, der stedes for dommen – ?

I, the divorced cable gown

The talent of a creepy wildlife sneeze evolves my pumped frog boss into committing a 1991/1992 crime inside a vomit mountain.

I hang around working-class rabies-filled bats in order to advance to a lower position in my upcoming bathroom visit.

The sounds of a violent, drunken CD player interfere with the writing of my banned, yet unpublished, banana carpool novel.

The evening of a monumental arrest of a bald eagle evokes a tiny erotic cough from a disappearing vacuum salesman.

It seems that the sun is dying and the earth is smiling, but how come you do still insist on asking me down for a perfect summer drink of baboon urine?

I gather a small group of friends for some quiet time together only to find that I’m a massive, bacteria-stained silver bikini on a fat caravan.

It is not a problem at all! You can just go right ahead and say it. Just say it! We all want to hear it! There is no pressure from anybody in this office! Well okay then, maybe next time.

Underappreciated, underpaid underdogs will always get home safe in a pretty nice car from wherever they might be when you ask! You didn’t ask you say? Well, exquisite, Sir.

Be prepared for a takedown of otherworldly proportions when I manage to put on a slim pair of normal priced cowboy pants.