{"id":214,"date":"2018-09-29T20:59:22","date_gmt":"2018-09-29T18:59:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/?page_id=214"},"modified":"2018-09-29T20:59:22","modified_gmt":"2018-09-29T18:59:22","slug":"a-handjob-beats-a-dayjob","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/a-handjob-beats-a-dayjob\/","title":{"rendered":"A handjob beats a dayjob"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>D|o|G<\/strong>, 2018 | Da rigshofmester Joachim Gersdorff i 1658 m\u00e5tte underskrive Roskildefreden, hvorved Danmark mistede sine \u00f8stlige landsdele Sk\u00e5ne, Halland og Blekinge til Sverige, udtrykte han angiveligt et \u00f8nske om, at han ikke havde kunnet skrive, s\u00e5 han ikke havde v\u00e6ret n\u00f8dt til at s\u00e6tte sit navn under en s\u00e5 grufuld fredsaftale. Helt modsat vil alle dannede og l\u00e6sende mennesker prise sig lykkelige over, at D|o|G \u2013 Diaper of Glory \u2013 har adgang til at nedf\u00e6lde sine sublime digteriske frembringelser p\u00e5 skrift, da det ellers ikke ville have v\u00e6ret muligt at l\u00e6se eksempelvis dette seneste digt fra mesterens h\u00e5nd.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p><em>A handjob beats a dayjob<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Cycling is a way of keeping up with sensual warfare for some people in the afterlife.<\/p>\n<p>I drag his coffee body down to the river with a bloody machete in hand, only to cuddle in his feminine scooter arms and bleach his enormous testicles 10 kilometres under water.<\/p>\n<p>Juvenile grown up asteroid-kids shop inside a flamingo stained concentration camp while willingly shitting in their own mouths and declaring: \u201cWhat a mouthful\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>Tobacco upbringing among empty cigar boxes is plenty of reason to hit travelling business coca cola coffins close up and at full diaper force!<\/p>\n<p>Lift a functional spine chord to the cucumber clouds and pray for a false hair transplantation on a hairless home-grown buffalo ass.<\/p>\n<p>Billie Jean is not my lover, she is just a girl who lays dead on Helsing\u00f8rmotorvejen because of my anger issues. That was just a joke peeps combined with being completely sincere and truthful.<\/p>\n<p>High on the thought of being held down by a naturally brutal Chinese law enforcement, keeps me somewhat lazy and horny when I look at modern soil.<\/p>\n<p>I ride on a carpet of suppressive euro porn and crash into a city of disgusting progressive welfare, while wearing a greenish tank top.<\/p>\n<p>Find Finn fin\n<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>D|o|G, 2018 | Da rigshofmester Joachim Gersdorff i 1658 m\u00e5tte underskrive Roskildefreden, hvorved Danmark mistede sine \u00f8stlige landsdele Sk\u00e5ne, Halland og Blekinge til Sverige, udtrykte han angiveligt et \u00f8nske om, at han ikke havde kunnet skrive, s\u00e5 han ikke havde &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/a-handjob-beats-a-dayjob\/\">L\u00e6s resten <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-214","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/214","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=214"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/214\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/fldg.dk\/dog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=214"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}